S1 E1 Why I can’t write blogs?
Before I write a blog on that, there’s a few things you should know about my writing. The most important being that I don’t. I don’t write. At least, not in the professional sense of the word.
You see, writing is a very personal experience to me. I usually write as a way to deal with overwhelming emotions; or to elaborate on ideas that I know for certain are absurd. But it’s not just about the content or the topic being discussed. The very act of sitting down and being indulged in your own thoughts is the most intimate experience you can have with yourself.
As you may have guessed, my writing tends to be like a personal diary. Diaries are liberating in a manner that no other form of writing can be. I do not have to worry about structure or grammar. I can change languages mid sentence and it would still make perfect sense. I can shift from writing to doodling and back to writing again and it would still be a continuous thought. I can go from pens, to colours, to pencils very conveniently.
None of this is possible in a formal writing. No matter what you say about personal blogs, they do not offer the flexibility of a paper. Besides, paper and pen/cils having been the medium of learning (at least until recently), allow you to process your thoughts in manner that typing would simply not produce. It’s not about speed. I am typing at a pretty decent speed right now, and yet I’ve to think every line individually as against while writing. In fact, the first two drafts of this blog were written on paper for the very same reason. When you’re not backspacing and simply striking out the not so relevant ideas, you aren’t losing them; simply saving them for later.
Finally, in the internet age that we are currently living in, nothing you do online is for you. Everything is a presentation, from the food you eat, the dress you like or the work you do — creative or otherwise. Everything needs to be made palatable. For your blog. For your feed. You need pretty pictures. You can’t possibly say words that aren’t poetry or sassy. And you need to follow schedules more strictly than your assignments or work. Because it won’t be picked up by the algorithm otherwise, would it?
Well, my diary stays locked up for months at end, but it still treats me just as kindly when I don’t leave it for days together. All I am trying to say is, it’s a lot of investment, and you do not get returns unless you treat it like your primary work. But I don’t write that frequently. So I guess it’s not for me.
Why then, am I writing this all here, instead of in my beloved diary? And that too with a title that says Episode 1, inherently implying more episodes will follow? I am not a crazy person who can’t decide what I want. I’ll let you know more about the blog in my next post! Because revealing it right now would hamper my views and we can’t afford that.
P.S. It also seems a little stupid to sign off with my name when it’s already there on the profile!
